Idiots Guide: Top 5 Mischievous Ways to use Super Powers


Imagine a world where you had some form of super human ability. Common decency would dictate that you use your powers ‘for good’. However, on the flip-side of benevolence exist darker, perhaps more malevolent possibilities. We are in no way advocating for bad behavior, however where is the harm in entertaining some of the ways one could presumably use their powers for…mischief. Can we interest you in some?

#5. Shape – Shifting. 

The power to change your human form into any other human form.      Ever wondered what it would be like to be say…Brad Pitt for a day? Your favorite Rock star?  What about your boss? A quick shape shift into your boss long enough to authorize that raise or promotion would be kind of awesome, no?  The general manager of your favorite sports team on draft day would be kind of sweet. As would a momentary shift into a politician on the day of a critical swing vote. One could frame the hell out of somebody as well. And what about a quick shift into Justin Beiber so that you can punch yourself in the face, repeatedly? Oh, wait. Never mind, you’d need a different power for that to work correctly. #CarriedAway Regardless,  Shape-Shifting can be a grimy ton of fun! shapshift faces

#4. Telekinesis.

The power to move inanimate objects with a simple pointed thought. There is no shortage of annoying people in this world. Therefore having the ability to throw things at them with just a thought would feel great.  So to, would the ability to move people out of your way. Being able to lock and unlock any door or safe sounds liberating, oh wait, liberating is what you’ll probably be doing with the valuable contents inside of those vaults, safes, etc. A telekinetic mind can be wonderfully wicked. Just saying…


#3. Super Speed. 

The ability to catapult yourself at incredible speeds at any given moment. This ability makes you a walking ‘alibi’. This is very useful when you decide to pull off a shady caper in Fresno, you can be back in L.A. in three minutes. Pretty sweet. You can also be involved in multiple capers in the same day without issue. If you move fast enough, in theory you could actually go back in time, or freeze time in the present while you do whatever unscrupulous activity you desire. Besides being insanely fun, being super fast is super useful in the commission of felonious behavior. super speed

#2. Flight / Teleportation.

The ability to fly at will with the speed of a falcon, coupled with the ability to teleport yourself from any one location, to any other location. Full disclosure, this super power is #1 in the book of this author, although #2 on this specific list. This is the ultimate ‘now you see me, now you don’t’ ability. This set of powers is unmatched in terms of a good ‘getaway’. Frankly, you name the felonious activity and this power works like a charm. One could jump in and out of any vault containing cash, and/or valuables in the blink of an eye. One could commit a multitude of crime in a quick and efficient way. The good news is the necessity to commit acts of violence would be null and void. The best news is the freedom to acquire compact materials of value at a dizzying pace.

Human Teleportation

#1. Invisibility. 

The ability to disappear from plain sight at any moment in time. Imagine the possibilities? Anything from a ‘fly on the wall’ to a ‘peeping tom’ are all in play with this power. One could be anywhere, without actually being seen there. I think that the best description of the use of this super power as ‘aggressively proactive anonymity’, or a ‘living ghost’. Putting the ‘creep factor’ aside, this power lands itself at #1 on our list of Mischievous Super Power Uses. Did you hear that sound? Is there somebody in here? invisible


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